Journal 2: our janitor does not look like that!

There's something to be said for conformity. It's safe, it's familiar, it's...boring. Here are some variations on the signs you know and love. I used the familiar black and white with no color because I feel that signs stand out more with that kind of contrast.

 Men's Bathroom. Women's Bathroom. Is that all we are to you, Olive Garden? Plain ol' men and women? Well I think differently. I think we are movie stars. We have bouncy' wonderful hair at all hours of the day. We have glorious Burt Reynolds mustaches. We wear tuxedos and slinky dresses. Bathroom doors should reflect that.

 I remember being in elementary school and looking at these weird red capsules all over the walls. They were encased in glass, so clearly i wasn't allowed to touch. They said "fire extinguisher", but how is that descriptive? It could shoot snakes that eat fire for all I knew. With this symbol, you know exactly what you are getting. Your buddy Steve on fire again? Now you know exactly what to do.

 Parking garages are really just big slabs of payment where cars go to have a sleepover with their other car buddies. And after a little while, their parents come pick them up and take them home. Or babysitter valet guy will get them. If a sleeping car doesn't scream parking garage, that's okay. You shouldn't scream anyways; the cars are sleeping.

 Oh Janitor. I know things didn't quite pan out in your life. You didn't expect to mopping up other people's messes for minimum wage. You really tried to get your Whitesnake cover band, Albino Serpent, off the ground but all your band-mates got married and grew up. And now you're stuck in a tiny room inhaling chemicals that probably cause cancer. Well there's no need to give up on your dreams that easily. Tell everyone passing by that you can still rock that broom and to please pick up their trash.

 Nothing says luxury like crystal swimming pools and caviar dreams. But only a handful of executives have that in their bathroom. What they do all have is legal tender toilet paper. For when you're so rich, hundred dollar bills are as common as a Wal-Mart receipt blowing in the poor person wind (note: rich people vacation on an island where the ocean breeze is pure oxygen). The picture of the roll of c-notes clearly explains that if you can see it, you don't belong. Maybe you can feel the cool refreshment of a Benjamin on your backside after that promotion, champ.

The "hook" is the universal sign for "you're outta here". While most venues with stages have done away with the hook, the sign remains universal. It means you're leaving, whether it's the building or spotlight.